Wednesday, December 30, 2009

something feels not right inside my body... de wound is healing up nicely. i tink de scar wun be so bad. but something is rumbling inside my body. at the back of my left lung. no idea wad it is. but it doesnt hurt la. just dat its irritating. i just hope its not internal bleedin or anithing... if not i'll probably hafta get hospitalised again. i tink shud be fine since i dun feel pain. and i dowana post day 5 alr. LOL. basically day 5 in hospital was a very haappy day.

day 5 dey removed the chest tube. wads a chest tube, a tube dat goes straight into my chest. NOT THE LUNGS U MORONS. de tube is pretty big. de circumference is abt de size of a 50cents coin. not exaggerating. i tink its abit bigger den 50cent coin. and de tube is heavy. not say very light. but not very heavy either. hahaha. yea if move too much it will lug ur skin and PAIN. so before dey removed it, lyk 2hrs when de doctor came to check on last time before he confirms dat can take out de tube... i asked him how dey gna take out. HE DIE OSO DOWAN TELL ME. i asked twice. den he finally said, "it'll take arnd 10 minutes only, u'll be very very surprised how its taken out." so of course it made me tink alot... but none of wad i tot of, is real... here's the process of how the large ass tube is taken out.

first they tear out the dressing or bandage covering the tube thats connected to my skin. the point whr it pierces into de body la ok. removing the bandage was dam painful alr. cuz dey bao until dam thick. den tear out dam pain. =.=. stupit nurse. and tearing it out was dam pain oso, cuz IT LUGS THE TUBE AT THE SKIN DERE. dam pain. dats de start... frm den on, i didn't look alr. looking is dam bad, its lyk de pain u exp is times ten. even if no pain u will get pain if u look. so i dint look. i not dat brave. LOL. den frm now on de doctor started briefing me wad's gna happen and wad i MUST DO . pls take note all dis is done in my ward, not even operating theatre. LOL. yea so nxt she told me dat i hafta breathe in and hold my breath. and tell me dun release! she say if i release and im not supposed to, will have complications. so first thing i asked, how long must i hold, so she say, short short onli, she will hold her breathe with mi. btw de doctor removing my tube is a her. ya and so i feel something very stingy nxt, she was undo-in de stitches dat was stitching the tube to my body. den BEFORE I NOE IT, I HEAR HER SAY DAM QUICKLY! "NOW TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND HOLD IT IN!" den i faster suck in and hold it! OMG I DINT NOE WAD WAS GOING ON, SO DARN SUDDEN, I NOT EVEN PREPARED. before i noe it she said, OK ITS OUT! u can breathe out alr. "?!?!?!??!" SO FAST?! it dint even last half a minute. n de tube is out. omg later den i found out dat de doctor n a nurse just ripped out de tube while i held my breathe. lyk literally pull it out dam fast. AAAAAAAAAAAAAA! DE TOT OF IT HURTS LYK NUTS. imagine such a huge tube. its lyk u stab me den u rip out de knife. but it dint hurt alot! i tink it was too quick for me to react. hahahaha. anws i wasn't on painkillers at all. i was in my normal state. de nxt thing was, TIGHTENING THE STITCH. dis one was hell. pain lyk ?!?#%$@^. seriously. dam pain. its lyk one big hole dere den she take de stitch and pull the 2 sides of de skin and tighten it. wa dam pain. aft dat its done. even aft dat still got aft effect frm de stitches. dat was how de chest tube came out... T.T

hahaha yea den i was a free person!!! when i first came off de bed, dam funi, i was trying to hold something at de left, whr de tube used to be. hahaha den i realised, "eh no more tube alr". hahahaha. dam funi. i couldn't get used to it, i walk arnd i kip tinkin i left something behind or forget to take something. its actly de tube. LOL. anws i got some pics dat looked dam familiar to me. i found it online.

the chest tube not so alike, but its roughly like that. firstly, the container u see at de end of de tube, IS NOT SO SMALL. LOL. mine was HUGE. de height is frm de feet to the thigh dere or knee. yea dam big. den all de blood and stuff dat comes out goes inside. n dere is no gay handle as in de pic. its too heavy, u cant even lift it. LOL. as in mine, ya. den de tube is much larger. and i dint look so happy lyk de guy in de pic =.=. whereas the penetration point is abt de same as dat guy. mine is lower. maybe cuz de previous tube was dere alr. btw i had 2 tubes. one small n one big, but dey removed the small one first den put in de big one. ya.

this was EXACTLY how my x ray looked lyk! dam cool! as u see, de right side is much much bigger den de left, well the right one u see is actly the left lung and the left side is de right lung. if u duno why means u nvr learn bio. its cuz u seein de front view so u must invert it. anws yea de left lung is much bigger becuz! dis picture shows when de lung is deflated, meaning when u breathe out. aft u breathe out, de left lung still looks dam big becuz dere's alot of air in ur chest, due to de leakage. so de extra stuff u see is actly de air column in ur chest. so it is bigger. yea dam cool. my first x-ray looked exactly lyk dis. but de one aft dat not so big alr, cuz got air drain out so dint look as big.

hahaha i just hope everything is over alr. nxt monday is my final checkup, hope my x ray shows positive results. tml i have a checkup oso. its to check on my wound, the hole frm de tube. yea apparently de wound is so darn deep dat its not closed yet. but dun be dumb, u cant see de inside.

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Sunday, December 27, 2009

hmmm lets see, school is starting tml. BUT! hahahaha not for me i guess. i have MC until next year. might sound lyk, WOAH YOU HAVE MC UNTIL NEXT YEAR! SO LONG LEH.! hahahaha but its onli lyk 4 days to nxt yr. hahahaha. just wana make it sound nice. actly i have MC until 5th jan. so im excused for de first 2 weeks of school. LOL. so its .................... i forgot wad i actlty wanted to type, ling called and i got stuck at "so its". aft she hung up i realise i forgot wad i wanted to type. k anws. i have MC until 5th jan. woo hoo. maybe dis sem my results gna suffer. den again maybe i'll pull off a miracle ^^. hahahaha. maybe i secretly mug at home for de 2 weeks im off. ho ho. den pull off a surprise attack and get GPA 4. LOL. k im dreaming. i can nvr get 4 or close to 4. BECUZ ITS NOT COOL TO GET GPA 4!

speaking of 4, i shall post abt day 4! of my hospital ordeal.

Thursday (17/12)

thursday! i was feeling great! de pain was still dere but it was mild as compared to de other days. anws, i was feeling great! i reali felt darn great! i duno why but i recalled de feelin darn well. i felt GREAT! but of course my movements n stuff still restricted. morning de doctor came, he asked a few qns and i told him, I DUNID THE MORPHINE ANYMORE. i told him lyk a serious tone, den i asked if can remove de tubes. and he monitored the amnt i used, den he said ok. later dey'll take it out. YEA! dats de 2nd last tube. to be removed. dat tube was quite bad, it restricted alota my movements cuz de tube quite short den my hand lyk cant move far. ya. if move too far den dere will be a tug and..... PAIN.

den aft an hr de nurse came n removed a bunch of tubes. hahahaha. so happy. felt abit more free. den de physio therapist came! hahaha. he said i was gna do walking today. I GOT UP WITH EASE! AND WALKED WITH EASE. he was shocked. he was telling me, "wow! most patients at day 3/4, will still be whining while they walk and crying out in pain, but it seems u are ok alr". sth lidat. hahaha. de uncle opposite my bed who is also sorta my fren, told the physio dat ima miracle man. here's de story.

de uncle opp my bed was hospitalised dere for more den 2 wks alr. and he saw a few patients who were lyk mi oso. but saw no one recovered as fast as mi. LOL. de previous guy took twice de amnt of time as mi to recover. hahaha. yea so... even de physio was surprised. walkin was quite tiring. yea apparently i hafta push this thing as i walk. cuz de large tube draining out waste frm my chest area is still attached to me which is linked to a huge container to store de stuff. so i hafta push this long pole with wheels. lyk u watch in those shows. LOL yea. so on thursday i felt great. i could walk alr and i can even walk to de toilet to pee dere. but peeing took longer den usual. still had difficulties. hahaha. BUT ITS A GOOD START! i also asked de doctor when i can be discharged and he said TML! HE SAID TML! HE SAID TML HE WILL REMOVE DE LAST TUBE AND GO FOR XRAY. IF DE XRAY WAS FINE DEN I CAN BE DISCHARGED! i was darn happy. my appetite was much better also today. i ate alot more den previous days. but i still cudnt finish all de food. duno why. maybe i dunid dat much energy.

so YEA! i got darn excited. to be honest. i dint catch any slp at all dat night. i couldnt sleep. one big factor is cuz IM GETTING DISCHARGED. another is cuz. I FEEL DAM DIRTY. not de pervert kind but de literal meaning. i dint bathe for so many days la. i was dirty everywhr. too dirty to slp. OMG tinkin abt it makes mi feel disgusting. i dint bathe for exactly 5 days on thursday. terrible. i reali felt dam disgusting n cudnt slp at all. all dat in my mind was.... omg i wana bathe. i wana bathe. i wana bathe. not dat i dowana bathe. but i cant bathe. u cant bathe with tubes stuck into u n stuff. yea. n its de first day i could walk abit. so ya. an exciting day for mi and at de same time hard to endure due to de state my body is in. hahaha

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Friday, December 25, 2009

alrite now shall post day 3 of the horrible ordeal in SGH

Wednesday (16/12)
Today food can finally enter my mouth. i dint eat for arnd 2 days alr. becuz before the op i hafta fast, meaning cant eat and drink. and after the op duno why they dint let me eat also, either way i was in too much pain to eat. day 3 morning, i was served breakfast. as usual the daily cycles. by then i was dam familiarized alr, i even knew wad time wads gna happen. here's de cycle.

at 1230am, 830am, 430pm, they will come and inject 3 syringes into my body, 2 is antibiotics and 1 is to prevent vomiting one becuz morphine makes mi vomit

at arnd 9-10am plus, my surgeons will come and visit me and check on how i am. they will ask me qns and stuff.

at 5am, its the most horrible time, there will be a "nurse raid" they will on all the lights and den alot of nurse will come into the room. LOL. yea lyk night raid. dey will come in to take everyone's temperature and blood pressure. LOL. yea. and stuff lidat. den dey will off de lights and walk out. dam horrible, u are nicely aslp n dey come disturb u.

alrite so day 3, i recalled de breakfast was this bee hoon with fish. de nurse forced me to eat it. he said, "eh bro you hafta eat something la" i recalled. he spoke lyk a malay and looked lyk one, but 2 days later i realised he's chinese. anws, he forced me to eat, i was still in great pain, cudn't sit up at all. in fact lie down also pain, had to press de morphine. i onli ate lyk 1 or 2 bites. thats it. was so pain i dint have de appetite. de day was terrible, by den my hand was swelling alr, but i dint notice. becuz dey owaes inject into de same spot, my right hand. not arm, hand. den by now dam pain alr. each time liquid flows thru will be dam pain. so i was in great confusion, if i press de morphine, it will stop de pain, but once i press de button, my hand dere will be dam pain. so lyk.... u press oso pain, dun press oso pain. i was screwin myself up. so most of de time i found myself bearing the big pain and not pressing the morphine. the day was terrible.

but one thing nice was the physio therapist. he came at arnd 11. i was aslp den, and someone woke me up. den i was half dead lidat. i dint reali got his name cuz, when he was introducing himself, i was half aslp lidat. LOL. i tink his name was michael. or sth lidat. he's a retarded person i swear... when he first woke me up, he talked to mi in a way as tho im retarded or dint understand english. he was lyk speaking dam slowly, "hello.......... my......... name....... is........... (whatever his name is)........... and........... i............... am............. your....................... physio..................... therapist...................." and bla bla. lyk in those children show. wth. but aft i responded he dint do dat anymore. maybe cuz he felt dat i was gna punch him but obviously i cant. hahaha. but he's a dam funi guy. he probably is in his 20's. confirm not 30. dam good looking, he seem to noe alota ppl dere. i tink de nurses see him as a funi guy. and he has a slang sometimes he speaks so i presume he studied overseas. he was lyk, toking to me abt all de stuff young ppl do, first he told me... wa so sad right, hospitalised now, u gna miss zouk out. den he start asking me if i go those kinda parties. and i said no. den he asked WHY. and he answered himself. he said, oh ya angmohs and foreigners lyk to go, most singaporeans dun. =.=. aft dat i added dat im still a minor. LOL. first physio therapy was to sit up. den i sat up quite smoothly, and he was kinda shocked. den he said, "so tell me, how much morphine did u press before i came". lol. yea i pressed twice before he came dats why not so pain. den did some basic exercises lyk move my limbs and stuff. den he start asking me if i have a gf and i said yes den he start asking those qns. lol. =.=. yea and tok tok tok. hahahahaha. den he left aft dat.

so de rest of de day i spent lying down and tryin not to move so the pain wouldn't come back. i realise aft i press de morphine, i must lie down n stop moving, once i move and change my body posture, de pain will start coming back. and jab again. so i hated it when i hafta pee. and yea i dun go to de toilet to pee. dey give dis container to pee in. sucks. lol. and dats day 3. mostly spent tryin to get rid of de pain.

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Sunday, December 20, 2009

alright im gonna post my horrible ordeal day by day. today i shall maybe cover day 1 and 2.

Monday (14th/12)

i went for my checkup in changi general hospital (CGH), did the usual stuff. went for an X-ray first to see if my left chest was still bloated with air. den when it was my turn to see de doctor, i was kinda scared. wad if things dun improve n stuff lidat..... den moment of truth. de doctor dint look happy. den he showed us de x-ray. it looked exactly the same as the previous thursday one. meaning air was still leaking. but it dint get bigger, just abit bigger. meaning the output and input is almost the same. it also means, the hole is not closing up by itself. so the doctor advised us to go for the operation. good things abt it, if operate, the chances of the lung bursting again is very unlikely, for the left lung la. right we duno. and also if dun operate, who knows what will happen in time to come. there's a huge risk of the hole gettin bigger. but also it will close up also la. so after thinking for minutes, decided to go for the op. but CGH dun have de facilities, so dey refered me over to singapore general hospital (SGH).

once arrive at SGH, waited dam long for a bed, becuz it was all full. i applied for class B2 ward. there was A class, B1, B2 and den C class. LOL. C class outa de qn. B2 had subsidies, total cost is arnd 5k or 6k. B1 costs 16k. 10k more. LOL. class A of course outa de qn. whats the diff? B2 and C no aircon and no tv. B1 had air con and tv. and of course 1 room got more ppl in the lower class one. so that night reali dun have B2 slots. SO I WAS PUT IN B1! hahahaha. totally different from B2 man. no wonder 10k more ex. de atmosphere everything. de tv was great. dey had ESPN and HBO channel. LOL. but i went to my ward at 12 midnite. i watched a movie on HBO before going to bed at 230am lidat. i watched the love guru. LOL. i was tinking, since tml op i will be slping alr, i wun nid slp now. hahahaha.

Tuesday (15/12)

i was woken up early in de morning by de nurse. she asked mi to sign some papers regarding the op. and becuz i was still below 18, nid parents consent. den de nurse told mi, my op was in de morning. MORNING?! dats my reaction, i tot it was aftnoon! den my parents rushed dwn to sign de documents so i can go for my op asap with no delays. dey transfered me to this operation bed. and pushed me to the operation room. it was a long way dere. lotsa stuff were running thru. BUT! its not stuff lyk, "im gonna die" or "omg its gna hurt" or "omg wads gna happen". NO! i tink i was tryin to be happy. so i was tinking, natural tots, i dint force myself to tink lidat, i was tinkin of "omg i look lyk im in a tv drama. im wearing a shower cap, have the mask over the mouth (de mask when ppl sit ambulance dey will put one), dat mask supplying mi with O2, and de white pillow, 2 nurses pushing mi, and a white blanket covering me." HAHAHHAA de onli thing missing was my girlfren maybe, dats de onli thing missing. in de shows de gf or loved ones will be lyk, "u'll be fine! dun worry! i'll be waiting for you..." LOL. dat was de onli thing missing. den push push push finally reach de place alr. IT WAS HELL COLD. dey had to put 3 layers of blanket on me. LOL. den i went into an anesthesia room. hoho. de place whr hell starts. de doctor briefly explain dat dey gna inject stuff to put me to slp. O M G i tell u. it was injection spree. i had total of 6++++ i onli counted 6. omg it was horrible, sometimes dere were 2 injections carried out at de same time! one at my hand and one at my back. OMG LA. i was lyk telling myself, "DUN MOVE DUN MOVE, LATER DE NEEDLE BREAK AT MY BODY IF I MOVE" so i was dam still and obedient. HAHAHA. dere was one injection dam screwed up, dey inject at my left hand and put a needle in, den one doctor said, "WHY U PUT AT THE LEFT HAND! CHANGE IT TO THE RIGHT!" dats when i noe... wth screwed up. den dey pulled it out and inject another time at the right. SCREW IT LA. den i was pushed into de operating theatre. dey had de huge lights on top and stuff. and all de ppl wearing masks. den before i noe it. i became unconscious. cuz i onli remember things until dere, to be honest i dint notice i became unconscious.

den de nxt moment i knew, i was in a hell lota pain. i rmb, i was calling out in pain, and i could hear de nurses say, "pls wait! the painkiller is coming. hang on awhile longer!" den aft awhile de pain was gone. my whole body was numbed to de pt i cudnt feel dem injecting anymore. but den i was still half aslp half awake. more lyk 3/4 aslp, my vision wasn't clear yet. de anesthesia dint go off completely yet. de op was done. dere were alota tubes connected to my body. 1 was water to my body, 1 tube was for the morphine, which is my painkillers. dey gave mi a button like thing and taught me to press it, once i press it morphine will flow into my hand dere by a tube. den dere was oxygen tube. and this large ass tube, dam big. sucking out de dirty stuff aft de op in my chest area. becuz de op was to make my lung shed out its outer layer, so dere was alot of blood in my chest n stuff, so de tube was to suck things out. den i was pushed to this room, it was sth lyk an ICU, just dat not so serious. its called high dependency ward, whr de ppl dere are dying ppl who nid alota attention. LOL. den dey have wires all over mi to measure my heart rate and blood pressure all de time in case i die. by de time i reach dere, i onli wanted to slp. i couldn't move. once i did pain will shoot thru my body. it was gay. de op ended at 2pm. frm den on, i onli recalled spamming the morphine. i couldn't eat yet. i kept on pressing the button. dey also kip on giving mi injections, inject antibiotics, to prevent infection frm de tube being inside my chest. de antibiotics was gay shit. shall tell why in de nxt post.

A HELL OF A POST. have fun reading. i doubt ppl will read de whole shit.

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Friday, December 18, 2009

HELLO WORLD! if you are reading this, I WISH TO SAY HELLO TO YOU!

im dam happy now, i shall do a detailed post later. now just a quick short brief one to update you all why i was missing for 5 days plus plus.

MONDAY

i went for my checkup at CGH and results showed no improvement, fearing it might get worse, dey encouraged a surgery, but CGH dint have de facilities so i was brought over to SGH. btw its singapore general hospital, de one at outram. i went in at night.

TUESDAY

the op was in the morning. before the op dey put mi to slp and den aft de op i was spamming morphine. btw morphine is de most powerful painkiller u can find. those ppl fight war arm drop off or wadever drop off, dey use morphine. LOL. dat was how much pain i was in. and i had to breathe in thru de oxygen tank delivered via a tube into de nose.

WEDNESDAY

the pain was better but not exactly de best. aft de op dey insert a huge tube in my body to drain out all de stuff lyk blood n stuff frm de lung area. was still spamming morphine but not as much. it was horrible. my hand and wrist swelled frm de excessive jabs i took.

THURSDAY

things were great. de pain was not pain anymore. i told de doctor, screw de morphine. so dey took out dam alot of tubes frm mi. de oxygen one, and alot la. i dam happy. left de huge tube draining out de stuff frm my lungs.

FRIDAY(today)

YEA! de final tube came out. was stitched on de spot oso. i swear de stitching wasnt nice at all... den i got discharged at 3pm arnd dere. de guy opp mi called mi a miracle man. before mi a young guy 21 yrs old oso kena exactly de same thing and he stayed for 8-9 days while i stayed for FOUR! hahaha suck on dat. loser. =X

reali reali reali reali very happy to be discharged. everyone take care of urself, de worst thing u wana do in ur life is getting admitted into a hospital.

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Sunday, December 13, 2009

tomorrow... what will the results tell me tomorrow?

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Friday, December 11, 2009

lets see... i just got rejected by a bunch of heartless ppl. HOW COULD U BEAR TO REJECT SOMEONE WITH A HOLE IN HIS LUNG?! btw the proper name for dis illness or wadever u call it is "Pneumothorax" chim stuff. Pneumo means air and thorax means chest, so air chest, meaning dere's air in my chest. if u take geog u shud noe wad is pneumo, pneumatophores dat pneumo. ok why air in de chest, cuz dere's a hole in my lung so obviously air comes out. lyk de hokkien saying goes, "LAO HONG!" when ur chips got soft n soggy u say it lao hongs, so now my lung lao hong. LOL.

to be honest, im tryin to make myself happy. reali. im dam scared deep dwn inside. i noe i hafta go thru another painful op. an op whr i'll be awake. and i noe its monday. ok maybe not monday.

but if its not monday sth more painful gna happen. k here's de plan for my lung. if monday's checkup shows negative results, meaning de air in my chest increases, it means my lung de hole is not closing up, therefore dey gta pull out de current tube AND INSERT A MUCH BIGGER TUBE. and i hafta get admitted. it sux. if de air disappears, den de tube comes off and finish. im normal again. wad abt if de air remains de same? den i remain de same. so... all de possibilities is gna suck for mi. all leads to pain, who wudnt get scared. i dowan monday to come, at de same time i want... i dun lyk dis feeling at all.

im organising a mahjong session tml, kip my mind pre-occupied frm

tinking so much. i just wana enjoy my days. anything can happen in an op. dere are risks. hope i can spend dis weekend well. if u read dis, dun pity me. shit i typed to fast, de stitch pricked mi. =.= anws if u are reading dis, im not asking for ur pity, i just want your company. ;)

shall post an interesting picture.

Synchronised sleeping :D

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Thursday, December 10, 2009

alrite... SUPER GOOD NEWS! my recovery is super speedy. later im going back to de hospital for a checkup instead of tml! hope dey gettin de sick tube outa my body. anws here's a brief one on wad happened. brief one nia cuz i onli have one hand to type with.

yesterday before edev paper, i suddenly felt my chest super pain, at de left. but being me i tot nth big so i did my paper first. but de pain went on so i went home immediately. den my parents took mi to de hospital fearing its a heart problem. cuz its de left part pain. aft de x-ray, de doctor showed us, de left lung had a hole and air was leakin, filling up de space dat de lung suppose to expand, therefore causin pain as de air dis-allows de lung to expand.

so i went for a mini op ytd, not a gd exp as i was awake in de op n it hurt lyk nuts. dey had to insert a tube into my body at de lungs dere, connected to dis syringe lyk thing outside de body, to drain de leaked air out. aft de op it hurts lyk nuts. but now! when i was slpin halfway i realise it dint hurt alot anymore!! but still pain. dats de rough thing dat happened. sucks to be me.

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Wednesday, December 09, 2009

screw e-dev. dfund was great today, hahaha. I HOPE EDEV WILL BE SIMPLE AND STRAIGHT FORWARD. if guai lan questions come out... its over for all of us. even the non guai lan qns abit shakey alr. o m g. aft tml its gna feel lyk end of exams. LOL. somehow when FASC is gone, another gay subj takes over..... while studying edev i fear for sem exams... if now alr so gay... wad more when de later chapters come in... makes ppl wana scream. sucks.

shall see what i can squeeze in tml.

forgot who's ass it is. found dis pic in my folder... looks lyk mr Khng's ass. help anyone?

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Monday, December 07, 2009

EMATHS TOTALLY SUCKED. DE SETTER MUST BE A RETARD SETTING DIS KINDA RETARDED PAPER! well pretty obvious my marks are gone. but no worries, doubt i will fail. tinking about it makes me scared. hahahahaha. hope things goes well for emaths. btw if u're still tinking elementary maths, u low iq. its engineering maths.

Dfund tml! dfund dfund dfund dfund. shud not be a big issue. WEDNESDAY IS DE MAIN ISSUE.

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