Monday, April 14, 2014
waiting for the stars to align.
Based on: 1:41 AM ,
Monday, September 03, 2012
somehow i think i dont believe in love or eternal love anymore or the word forever.
Based on: 11:35 PM ,
Thursday, August 30, 2012
solitude, problems, no solutions, no will, no one.
Based on: 10:10 PM ,
Tuesday, August 07, 2012
what the hell... its not money i want. just wna find something i lost.
Based on: 10:42 PM ,
Its 2012. blog's 7th year
Thursday, August 02, 2012
its my new phase of life. a phase after studies are completed, or mostly completed. comparing me now with me in what i read in my previous posts, a definite difference. life is in shambles now. i guess things dont go the right way all the time... this phase of down side life seems to be going way longer then any i had so far, hopefully i can find strength to fight once again. fight for a better life for myself.
a lifeless doll like me now is not gonna achieve anything... if only i can find back the fight in me back in ncc days or even younger days back in school. im into my career now, and its just the beginning, if i lose the drive now, im gonna lose everything. grant me strength to fight... to do something that i see meaning to.
not sure who is gonna see this, probably old friends.
Based on: 8:59 PM ,
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
when i tot i dowana blog anymore. here i am. hahaha. not sure who still bothers coming here to read.
this place is just kinda screwed up. ppl who suck at sth, shud just admit they suck at it. dont pretend to be gd at it, de worse kind are the ignorant one. they suck at it yet they still dno, and they dowana hear anyone out. living in their own little world whr dey think they are gd at it but they actually is not. after all this shit i finally realise, what defines a home or a family.
what defines a home? furniture? how big it is? the design? the necessities u have? its definitely the people. apparently some ppl just dun understand this basic yet common principle. even if u have de grandest home, all the most expensive furniture, gadgets, electronics, if the people all stink, its not a dam home. if ur home just has cheap furniture with only a tv maybe, but u are greeted with warm smiles, genuine concern and nt a bunch of dirt ass ppl who does everything for a motive. and so this crosses over to family. whats a good family? i always tot mine wasnt great. you know how i vented about it. yea i still hate my dad. no doubt. but i think my family's great.
theres love. someone who believes what i say when they ask me sth. fake love is just disgusting. its retarded when dey say im doing this for your own good. when they dont even know u at all n wna do something for u. thats bullshit. know the person before u wna help. if u tink de aunty wna cross de road, but u dint bother askin if she wants to cross de road, n she doesnt want to n u hlp her cross de road, u tink she'll be happy? so before u wna help someone, u better get to know that person if not dont fking think you know that person and make things worse. just because you think its right doesnt mean it is, u are not god or sth.
then theres prblm with ppl also. you hear what you believe what. as long as the person your fren u believe. wth is that. the person dno anything abt it, just saw, but dno anything, comes to tell you, you hear, you dont even noe anything abt it, 2 idiots who know nth abt it, then ends up thinkin they noe everything abt it, jumps to conclusion themselves, nw they so stuck up and think they know it all. its just pure retarded. its not even you, make it seem like u know it all.
everything yours will always be the best and the rest are all dirt. stop being selfish and open ur eyes. its all only about you right. other ppl one nt my prblm. these kinda ppl deserve to just die first. cuz when disaster strikes, these are de fkers that snatch for food and water and leave few for the rest. maybe someday these kinda ppl shud try, since they so self centered, everyone else shud just disappear and u try living alone on this planet, see if u like it. den u can have all de dam things you want to yourself. maybe that will be the best. throw u to mars.
i came to realise how much trust this home has. nt frm my dad of course. trust is important in a family. if u dun trust me, i rather u nt talk to me. cuz whatever i say u wun believe anws so why bother asking. like what i always say, if u wun even gna believe waad im gna say, u bother askin for what? seriously. dun trust dun ask. dun waste time. u might as well just conclude de qn yourself. hate tthis kinda dumbasses de most. wna ask den dowana trust. seriously dam stupid.
yea really long vent. i hardly do this shit. if u manage to read till here, i bet u feel me. worse of all, if u are ignorant, u will forever be like that. this are the worse kinda ppl. ignorant to everything, dun even noe de prblm lies with your ownself and u blame de entire world for everything that is ur fault. these kinda ppl no hope. die miserably still trying figure out who's at wrong but they see de person all de time in de mirror.
ok i think i feel better. phew. dont worry, if u are overly paranoid or sth n think some stuff refering to u or sth, its definitely not. confirm. haha. 100%.
Based on: 9:18 PM ,
Saturday, January 01, 2011
As a Pisces male you commit yourself to a single person, your dream woman.
As a Pisces female selfless care is what your partner gets from you.
Based on: 11:47 PM ,
everything just doesnt feel like a new year... :/
Based on: 2:08 PM ,
Sunday, December 26, 2010
its holidays :D for both of us! though its ending pretty soon :(
& thanks for waking me up every morning! haha kinda realised it too when you told me today.
yeap so went to orchard on christmas eve with lewis (: went around shopping for christmas gifts, then saw a wallet that matched his. but walked off to look for other stuff. haha in the end he went back to buy it! surprised. haha thanks(: though felt kinda bad to make u spend so much><
yup and christmas went over to his place to set up the keyboard and play risk! the tv is kinda cool! and i kept losing in risk. guess its just luck! but was kinda fun(: lewis is a typical russian. conquered all my territories even though he said it was for defence. haha and at night went to play sparklers. the explosion was pretty. flying everywhere. no wonder ncc does it every year. saw the past year videos. hahaha!
made some letters too (:
today! slept through the whole afternoon. hahah then woke up, and my dear 企鹅爸爸 decides to cook! hahaha! wanted to help, but guess hes too good so i couldnt enter the kitchen. watched tv while he cooked. haha
Based on: 11:37 PM ,
Saturday, December 18, 2010
waiting for my piggy to wake up now. meanwhile maybe a post. haha. its the start of holidays! omg finally. finally can have the feel of wakin up late. today is the first tho. i woke up at 10am! LOL. u might think that is not late, yea i noe that is not late. but its comfortably late. actly i sorta prefer to wake up at 10-11+ rather than last time back in year 1 i would wake up at 4+ lidat, den get a headache when i wake up. haha. so this is comfortable :). guess i'll continue to slp early cuz i feel healthy. haha.
ok and im dying to get a new phone. stupid current one is messing things up. but the price of the phone i want wouldnt get on offer again. ><><>
and next, LTT has been kinda smooth i guess. and i guess im starting to learn driving again nxt week. hope things go better this time round. i suppose this holidays will probably be gone in a flash and before u noe it, we gta get our ass to LTT again. things are always lidat, when we are having fun and enjoying ourselves, time passes like no ones business. but when we are suffering n miserable, time just likes to take its own sweet time. LOL. yup. gta admit on that. ><. guess gta make gd use of this hols. cuz aft this hols wl gna start sec4 which means nt a very fun year =.=.
looks dam professional? yup. actly im just being retarded. you dont need eye shield and ear muffs to saw a stupid piece of metal. LOL. just wearin to feel cool.
Based on: 11:08 AM ,